Kristin & Steve’s Adoption Journey
Adoption is a journey. In these features, we give hopeful adoptive families the space to share what they’ve learned, what they’ve struggled with, and what keeps them going. We’re so happy to introduce you to Kristin & Steve.
Tell us about yourself and how you made your way to PairTree?
We are Kristin and Steve and have been looking to start a family for 13 years now! Though we have been through many ups and downs with infertility, adoption has always been apart of our plan since day 1. The best way to describe us is loving, adventurous, fun, dreamers, committed, and caring. Kristin is in the film and television industry and has worked with artist like Britney Spears, Prince and Cyndi Lauper. She also is a dancer teacher and mentor to thousands of kids all across the country. Kristin loves to teach kids about being Fearlessly Authentic and unique. Reminding them that there is only 1 of them in the entire world and to embrace that rather then hide it. Steve is a physician and works with patients that suffer from heart attacks. Steve is career driven but he is a family man first. He puts his family first and can’t wait to be a dad for the first time. Steve loves sports, working out, and grilling.
We made our way to PairTree by word of mouth. We made it known that we are looking to adopt and with our support system being so big and strong, our friends and family are trying to help out in anyway they can. When we looked into PairTree we loved the modern twist on meeting expected mothers. It is easy to access and also cuts out a lot of the unknown processes that come with trying to adopt. We look forward to meeting these incredible, selfless, and loving expected mothers. We aren’t just looking to adopt a child, we are looking to adopt the entire process, and that includes the expected mother herself.
What has surprised you about this process – good and/or bad?
What has surprised us most about adoption is how many different “departments” there are. From agency’s, to attorneys, to consultants. You start to ask yourself, where do I even begin? We love PairTree because we don’t have to over think. This is a fun interactive way to communicate with other adoptive families as well as expected mothers. The frustrating part is the wait. Of course anyone that is looking to adopt wants everything to happen at lightning speed. We are learning to work on our patience.
What do you think is misunderstood about adoption?
We believe the biggest misunderstanding about adoption is people thinking of it as bad option to take a child away from their birth family. We believe it takes a strong, fearless, powerful woman to make a decision that is best for their child. The saying “A mother knows best” comes to mind. If this selfless warrior is feeling that their child would thrive in a different setting, then everyone must all honor that. We can’t image how difficult it must be for the expected mother to make a decision, but also so powerful that they know a piece of them is walking around in the world.
Who are your biggest supporters? Who can you always turn to?
Our biggest supporters are our families. We don’t have a huge family, but the family we have are as powerful as an army. They are ready to drop anything and everything to be there for one another. Our families have watched us suffer with wanting to raise a child for so many years and would be so happy to watch our dreams become reality. Both sides of our family have adopted family members, so everyone is loving and supportive of us choosing to adopt.
Do you have a favorite quote or mantra?
“Everything happens for a reason” used to be something we would always refer to, however with so many years of broken dreams of wanting to have children. This has been hard for us to understand.
Now we like “Be Still..and know”. We understand this isn’t our plan and we must obey, whatever the circumstances may be. We will not give up till we get the gift of raising a child. We know we are meant to be parents and we both believe we would be amazing at raising children.
How often do you cry? (Seriously…)
We wear our hearts on our sleeves. Of course we cry. We have found ourselves crying more and more as time goes by and our bedrooms stay empty. We also cry of joy. Not all tears are sad tears. Once we find our expected mother there will for sure be happy tears. Crying is healthy.
What you are most proud of – so far – in this process?
We would have to say we are most proud of our strength to continue. A lot of times when you face so many emotional let downs you just want to quit. We know that wasn’t an option for us. We have poured our hearts into this process and know the right person-at the right time-with the right child will present itself right in front of us and it all will be worth the wait.
What scares you the most about this process — and why?
Time. We can’t freeze time and wait. We fear that we will reach a point that we will be thought of as “too old”. Age is only a number, however when you have tried to have a child for 13 years it feels as though the time will run out.
If you had a magic wand, what would you like to change most about this process?
As soon as you hit “post” that the process is no longer a process but a success.
Click here to learn more about Kristin & Steve. They’d love to hear from you!